does everyone experience this?!?!
suddenly I realised that I don't seem to understand her that much anymore.. and she is not as supportive of decisions I made as she used to be.. are we loosing it? is the honeymoon period over so soon already?
today I am torned between my mum and her, and though I have the support of my mum, I actually need hers.. oh god please, could someone please help me?
I am currently looking back at the happiest moments we used to share, wondering when it could happen again? gone were the days of selfless love giving and sharing..
cars and what they really mean..
AUDI: Another Ugly Deutsche Invention
BMW: Brings Me Women but Broke My Wallet / Bring More Worries / Bus MRT Walking
FIAT: Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
FORD: Fast Only Rolling Downhill
HYUNDAI: Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable and Inexpensive
SUBARU: Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually
VOLVO: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
PORSCHE: Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything
10 Commandments of Marriage
10 Commandments of MarriageCommandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3
Marriage is grand - and divorce is at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4
Married life is very frustrating! In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.
Commandment 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you
finish.
Commandment 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.
Commandment 9
Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. That is why the wife treats the husband like toxic waste.
Commandment 10
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
liverpool??
to all my 'liverpool crazy' friends out there.. here is something for you..
weekly visits to our neighbour
i am so looking forward to the trip into malaysia again this afternoon, first to settle the printing of the wedding invitation cards, which really is much much cheaper that if it was done in singapore, then to walk alround shopping areas like 'jusco' or 'chang long'..
this has become like a weekly trip (as far as possible) to me and i really love it because the pace of life, the people and the environment is so unlike urbanised singapore, which i have slowly grown to not like so much as before.. malaysians are more simple minded (although vehicle thefts and robberies are very common in JB) but i was referring to the better part of them..
malaysia here i come, AGAIN!
food tasting
yesterday the two families had our food tasting, the dinner started off a little akward, with both sides not talking alot, only the 2 bridesmaid, grace and genevieve, peipei and myself doing much of the conversation..
however some way into the dinner, with the atmosphere pretty warmed up, and also after much hard work prompting by peipei and myself, the families started to open up, and the dinner seemed so much comfortable.. the two mothers, as like all mothers, who are relatively experts in food, started giving comments, with the occassional jokes that caused the whole table to burst into laughter..
Ghandism
Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K. Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his 9 June lecture at the University of Puerto Rico, shared the following story:-
I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. We were deep in the country and had no neighbors, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies.
One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father asked me to take care of several pending chores, such as getting the car serviced. When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, "I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together."
After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theatre. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30 before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00. He anxiously asked me, "Why were you late?"
I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, "The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait," not realizing that he had already called the garage. When he caught me in the lie, he said: "There's something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn't give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it." So, dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads.
I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again. I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all. I don't think so. I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday. That is the power of non-violence.
a man utd fan's letter to all liverfool fans
My dear beloved Liverfool fans,
I do hope with last night’s win, Reds will crawl back into the league standings. This is a onetime kind gesture by Man Utd to bring back the rivalry within the top 4, the make the EPL competitive, and without Liverfool’s rivalry, there is no shiok in watching the EPL.
Please don’t take Man Utd’s kind gesture for granted, the loss is good omen for Man Utd as last season we lost both legs to Liverfool, but still won the title, which matters most. I hope to see all Liverfool fans to be on a happy note today, as for the past 2 weeks, there were dejected, drowned in sorrow, feeling so depressed, and suicidal. Wish all Liverfool fans a great Monday.
Sincerely,
Man Utd Fan
a nice story to share..
4 years ago, an accident took my beloved away and very often I wonder, “How does my wife, who is now in the heavenly realm, feel right now? She must be feeling extremely sad for leaving a husband who is incapable to taking care of the house and the kid.” Because that is the exact feeling that I have, as I feel that I have failed to provide for the physical and emotional needs of my child, and failed to be the dad and mum for my child.
There was one particular day, when I had an emergency at work. Hence, I had to leave home whilst my child was still sleeping. So thinking that there were still rice leftovers, I hastily cooked an egg and left after informing my sleepy child.
With the double roles, I am often exhausted at work as well as when I am home. So after a long day, I came home, totally drained of all energy. So with just a brief hug and kiss for my child, I went straight into the room, skipping dinner. However, when I jumped into my bed with intention of just having a well-deserved sleep, all I heard and felt was broken porcelain and warm liquid! I flipped open my blanket, and there lies the source of the 'problem'.. a broken bowl with instant noodles and a mess on the bedsheet and blanket!
Boy was I mad! I was so furious that I took a clothes hanger, charged straight at my child who was happily playing with his toy, and give him a good spanking! He merely cried but not asking for mercy, except a short explanation, "Dad, I was hungry and there wasn't any more leftover rice. But you were not back yet, hence I wanted to cook some instant noodles. But I remembered you reminding me not to touch or use the gas stove without any adults around, hence I turned on the shower and used the hot water from the bathroom to cook the noodles. One is for you and the other is for me. However, I was afraid that the noodles will turn cold, so I hid it under the blanket to keep it warm till you return. But I forgot to remind you cause I was playing with my toys.. I am sorry Dad..".
At that moment, tears were starting to run down my cheeks, but I didn't want my son to see his dad crying so I dashed into the bathroom and cried with the shower head on to mask my cries. After that episode, I went towards my son to give him a tight hug and applied medication on him, while coaxing him to sleep. Then, it was time to clear up the mess on the bed. When everything was done and well past midnight, I passed my son's room, and saw that he was still crying, not from the pain on his little buttock, but from looking at the photograph of his beloved mummy.
A year has passed since the episode, I have tried, in this period, to focus on giving him both the love of his dad and mum, and to attend to most of his needs. And soon, he is turning seven, and will be graduating from kindergarten. Fortunately, the incident did not leave a lasting impression on his childhood memories and he is still happily growing up.
However, not so long ago, I hit my boy again, with much regret. This time, his kindergarten teacher called, informing me of my son's absence from school. I took off early from work and went home, expecting him to explain. But he wasn't to be found, so I went around our house, calling out his name and eventually found him outside a stationery shop, happily playing computer games. I was fuming, brought him home and whack the hell out of him. He did not retaliate, except to say, “I am sorry, Dad”. But after much probing, I realized that it was a 'Talent Show' organized by his school and the invite is for every student's mummy. And that was the reason for his absence as he has no mummy..
Few days after the caning, my son came home to tell me, the kindergarten has recently taught him how to read and write. Since then, he has kept to himself and stayed in his room to practice his writing, which I am sure, would make my wife proud, if she was still around he makes me proud too!
Time passes by very quickly, and soon another year has passed. It's winter, and its Christmas time. Everywhere the Christmas spirit is in every passer-by. Christmas carols and frantic shoppers, but alas, my son got into another trouble. When I was about to knock off from the day's work, the post office called. Due to the peak season, the post master was also on an edgy mood. He called to tell me that my son has attempted to post several letters with no addressee. Although I did make a promise never to hit my son again, I couldn't help but to hit him as I feel that this child of mine is really beyond control. Once again, as before, he apologized, “I'm sorry, Dad” and no additional reason to explain. I pushed him towards a corner, went to the post office to collect the letters with no addressee and came home, and angrily questioned my son on his prank, during this time of the year.
His answer, amidst his sobbing, was, “The letters were for Mummy.”
My eyes grew teary, but I tried to control my emotions and continued to ask him, “But why did u post so many letters, at one time?" My son's reply was “I have been writing to mummy for a long time, but each time I reach out for the post box, it was too high for me, hence I was not able to post the letters. But recently, when I went back to the postbox, I could reach it and I sent it all at once."
After hearing this, I was lost. Lost at not knowing what to do, what to say.
I told my son, " Son, mummy is in the heavenly kingdom, so in future, if you have anything to tell her, just burn the letter and it will reach mummy. My son, on hearing this, was much pacified and calm, and soon after, he was sleeping soundly. On promising that I will burn the letters on his behalf, I brought the letters outside, but couldnt help opening the letter before they turn to ash.
And one of the letters broke my heart.
Dear Mummy,
I miss you so much! Today, there was a 'Talent Show' in school, and the school invited all mothers for the show. But you are not around, so I did not want to participate as well. I did not tell Dad about it as I was
afraid that Dad would start to cry and miss you all over again. Dad went around looking for me, but in order to hide my sadness, I sat in front of the computer and started playing games at one of the shops. Dad was furious, and he couldn’t help it but scolded and hit me, but I did not tell him the real reason.
Mummy, every day I see Dad missing you and whenever he think of you, he is so sad and often hide and cry in his room. I think we both miss you very very much. Too much for our own good I think. But Mummy, I am starting to forget your face. Can you please appear in my dreams so that I can see your face and remember you? I heard that if you fall asleep with the photograph of the person whom you miss, you will see the person in your dreams. But mummy, why haven’t you appeared?
After reading the letter, I can’t stop sobbing, because I can never replace the irreplaceable gap left behind by my wife.
*
For the females with children:
Don't do so much overtime. If you cannot finish the work, it must be some kind of problems within the company, and it is not your sole problem. Feedback to your boss. Endless overtime may not necessary be the answer to the problem. Take care of your health so that you can treasure and take care
of your little precious.
*
For the married men:
Drink less, smoke less, because nothing can replace your good health, not even business nor clients.
Try thinking this way; Are you able to work till your clients are totally dependent on you? Or your boss is totally dependent on you? In this society, no one is indispensable.
Take care of your health, so that you can take care of your little precious and your loved ones.
*
For those singles out there:
Beauty lies in loving yourself first.
With confidence and loving yourself, you will see the beauty in other things around you. You will be able to work better and happier. Don't let your health be affected by your work or your boss, so nothing matters more than your well being.
going home!!
after an ardous 16 days in rostov, russia, today i am finally going back.. the last 3 days has really been busy for me, early morning work starts till late at night, couple with one hours walks between the ferry embarkation point and my hotel, finally its over.. i like to work with the people here, they are very helpful and at all times willing to share knowledge and information, no holds bare.. they also don't like to procrastinate much, only small talk and immediately do the job..
i have handed over all the job to the people here, bring them a walk through of the STBD strip on what needs to be done, and when (provided conditions do not change) an so today, NOW, i can leave with an easy heart, seriously you don't need me here to get the job done, but i can say with me here, job gets done easier because i have the facts & figures (dimensions) at my finger tips and i know the strip nearly inside out, i also appreciate the opportunity to work on the last 3 days, though the first 13 days was really wasting time..
and for the first time in nearly 2 weeks, i am blogging happily, waiting for half an hour more to go downstairs, check out and head for the airport.. i am eager again to see familiar faces at changi airport, singapore, here i come.. BACK
morning breakfast
i just came back from the morning breakfast.. i went down earlier than usual, @ 7.30am rather than 8.30am, because the last few days, the occupancy rate in the hotel is nearly exceeding 100% (yes!100%!)
yesterday, as all the other days, i went for breakfast at 8.30am, i waited about 15 mins for a lift to go downstairs, from 7th floor to 2nd floor where the restaurant was, only to realise that the restaurant was full (seat about estimated 150 ppl), sian, i went back up again and only had breakfast like nearly 10.00am just before the breakfast place closes for lunch preparations..
it is like they are having alot of conventions and meetings here, companies like Pfizer etc are all here..
updates so far..
there is nothing much to say these few days, except again i've been busy planning the wedding, consolidating the guest list by asking my friends via internet sms and msn whether they'll be free to turn up.. in the blink of an eye (actually it should be after dragging for so long), 10 days has passed, and it'll be another 6 days more before i'll be headed my way back to singapore.. something which i so look forward to, the friends the family, and of course to peipei..
so far it has been heard that the port strip has already cleared the rostov customs, and the transit permit has already been applied, and is now on its way to the first lock of the volga don canal, should reach there in a few hours time..
the stbd strip is still at rostov lower anchorage, still in progress of clearing the customs, afterwhich we will pull it to alongside a 60T shore crane to unload 6 wire drums of 30T each.. expected to remove the wire drums in the afternoon of today.. then the stbd strip will be pulled past the first bridge into the upper anchorage, which ballasting operations to acheive it to 3.2m draft, at even keel and 0 degrees of heel.. after which these conditions are acheived, we will have to wait till exactly 5 days after the port strip clear the first lock only is the stbd strip allowed to go in the first lock, the reason for the 5 days period is to allow for any unforeseen circumstances, which is very famous here in rostov, as the saying here goes, 'anything can happen here, at anytime', which we experience it many times before..
i miss peipei, and the first thing i am going to do when i touch down singapore, is to give her a really big hug and a big kiss, it is so punishing for the both of us to be away from each other for so long, i wonder if i will ever take up another overseas assignment again or not..
