CHELSEA SUCKS!
STREET CLEANER LINKED WITH CHELSEA JOB! EXCLUSIVE. Joe Harris, a 54 year old STREET CLEANER from Harrow, Middlesex, is the latest in a line of people who has been approached by Roman Abramovic for the position of the currently vacant Chelsea manager. Harris is believed to have been offered £5 milion a year for the next 4 years to help the blues regain their successes of recent seasons.Harris is a married man of 4 and has absolutely no experience of football apart from the odd kick around in the playground 40 years ago and watching Match of the Day on Saturdays. Abramovic sees him as a perfect replacement for Avram Grant who was sacked 2 weeks ago. However, Harris has publicly stated this evening that he is more than happy to continue his career cleaning the streets on minimum wage and besides, he has to hand in a months' notice so the move would have been out of the question.
It must come as a bitter blow to Abramovic who is fastly becoming the laughing stock of world football in his desperate search to find a suitable replacement before the start of the new Premiership season. Peter Kenyon has been given a blindfold, a pin and the telephone directory in an attempt to find their new Manager and this latest dismissal just adds to their frustrations. "If we don't find somebody soon, maybe I'll have to apply for the job myself!". Kenyon said jokingly. Jokingly? I think not.
posted by Linus Chia @ 1:00 AM
